Letter to myself
by Virpukka
Summary: I was listening Pink's song when I started to wonder what Brennan would write to herself.


_A/N: Here is my next fic. I got idea to this when I was listening Pink's song Conversations With My 13 Year Old Self. It made me think what Brennan would write to herself. So here is the result _

_ And like always, big thank you to Redrider6612 who is my beta._

Letter to myself

Dr. Brennan stared her screen. It was empty and waited for her to fill it with words.

'Why on earth this was so hard?' she thought. 'I'm a writer and this is just a stupid exercise from Dr. Sweets, nothing more.'

In their last therapy session Dr. Sweets had put her abandonment issues under his "microscope" and as result Dr. Brennan sat in her office and tried to start writing.

"I can do this. I'm writer so this is easy for me," Brennan muttered to herself, and after a while she started to tap her keyboard. First the words came slowly, but soon she found her "voice" and she was writing so intensely that her surroundings faded away.

A few hours later Angela was walking past Brennan's office. It was late, but the lights were on in there as usual. And as usual she went in to say goodbye to her friend and remind her that it was time to go home before she leaving for home herself. What she saw brought her up short. Brennan was asleep on her couch and Angela could see signs of tears on her face. Angela stood there indecisively for a long moment. She was just turning to leave when Brennan stirred.

"Stay." It was a simple request spoken quietly.

"How are you?" Angela asked and went to sit next to Brennan.

"I don't know."

"Do you wanna talk about it? You know sometimes it helps."

"Yeah…I don't know…I…I got this assignment from Dr. Sweets and it really hit me hard. It's on my computer."

Angela looked her friend and tried to read her expression. This was one of those rare situations where she wasn't sure what she wanted her to do. Brennan was again near tears. Angela waited for her to speak, but when it became clear that Brennan wasn't ready to talk she decided to ask her straight out.

"Hon, do you want me to read it or just sit here with you until you feel better?"

Brennan took a moment to think what she wanted and finally she gave a nod to Angela.

"You can read it, but please don't make me talk about it. You know how I hate psychology."

Angela was more than a little surprised. She had expected Brennan to say no to her--she didn't usually open up so easily. This Dr. Sweets assignment must have really shaken her. Angela went to the computer and started to read. It was a letter and when she saw who it was addressed to, it almost broke her heart.

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_Dear Temperance_

_I__'m writing__ to you from __the__ futur__e,__ so I know what you are going through __right__ now. I hope this letter will give you __the__ hope and strength to go forward. Things are __bad now__ and it __may__seem__ that there is no lig__ht,__ but believe me there is. Things __won't__ stay __the__ wa__y they are n__ow._

_I know __you are hurt__, lonely and scared. Everything familiar __has been__ taken away from you and everything fe__els ou__t of balance in your life just now. You think that everyone has left you, your mom, dad and your brother. You_'_re right, they left you. It will take a long time from you to forgive Russ and I can't change that but if I could give __you any__ advice it would be __to__ forg__ive him soon__. He's __all th__at is left __of__ your family and he loves you._

_As for__ your parents, I'm so__rry yo__u're not going to see your mom again. S__he will die and you will be__ the one who identifi__es__ her. I __won't__ li__e,__it will be__a__ hard day. Your father is different story, __if__ you wait long enough he will come back to you. It's not going to be perfect but he __will__. You will learn things from __them you might__ wish that you__hadn't,__ but I think it's the price __of__ getting them back._

_You wonder now __what__ will hap__pen.__ You will go __into the__ foster system and again I__won't__ lie to you, it will be scary and __a__ hard experience. They will bounce you from home to home and none of them __will be__ your real home. In some places they __will be__ nice to you and in some places you __will__ someti__mes be__ afraid that you __might__lose__ your life. It'll be hard but you __will__ get through. Never give up and never give in. Your grandfather will take you out __of__ system and you'll find purpose to your life._

_You are smart and it will help you __go__ far. You will graduate __at the__ top of your class and you'll find your place in this world. You will help so many famili__es get the__ closure __that__ you are longing __for__ now __for__ yourself. You maybe __lose__ your real family n__ow,__ but along the way you will find __a__ different kind of family, __a__family you__ will choose and who will choose you. They will be there for you no matter what and help you through some really difficult times. So don't __lose hope_

_I wish I __could save__ you and give you __a__ home. I wish I could ease your pain and tell __you__ that life will __become__ easier. In some ways it will because you have these friends around yo__u,__ but some of that __pain you__ feel now will follow you through your life. But __the__ people around you and the work __that__ you do, those are the things what will make your life __worth living._

_I'll see you everyday in your journey and I will keep __you__ comp__any.__ Just follow your path, don't __lose__ hope and keep your head up. _

_ Temperance_

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Angela stared the screen, she could feel her own tears running down her face. Slowly she stood up and walked over to Brennan.

"Oh sweetie" she said as she hugged her best friend. "Let it come out, you have kept it inside long enough and as you wrote, we won't leave you no matter what."

Brennan sobbed against Angela until she was so exhausted that she fell asleep again. Angela kept her in her lap and watched her best friend quietly. That was how Booth found them later when he came to pick up Brennan to take her home. He studied situation and tried to figure out what had happened.

"Hi, is everything okay?"

"Yes, I think everything is okay now. She had rough day but for once in her life she let it all out. When she wakes up will you take her home?"

"Yeah, that's why I'm here actually. What happened?"

"She will tell you if she wants. I'm sorry Booth, but I can't talk about it."

"It's okay. It's probably Dr. Sweets exercise that he gave her and you're right, she'll talk when she is ready."

"Yeah."

Silence fell in Brennan's office as her other kind of family waited for her to wake up.

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I'm not going to beg but you know how to make me happy, so push that little button.


End file.
